Your Weakness Can Make You Stronger If You Do This One Thing
❶ I was sitting at Encore Une Fois, a small cafe in Montreal. I had just sat down to order my regular tuna sandwich.
I liked to sit in the back corner so I could survey the restaurant, the door, and the exit. I was always drawn to that position even before I learned about its tactical advantage.
I smiled at the staff - all young university students - I knew them well. I had been eating there for many years. I had once broken up a crazy fight inside the restaurant, so the owner and staff knew that I ran a self-defense school.
Today, the owner Lenny approached me with a look of urgency - there had been a robbery at gunpoint in the store next door and his team was terrified…he asked me, would I please train his staff??
The year was 1987 and I had already been teaching our unique brand of scenario-inspired self-defense for almost a decade - while I was upset at what had happened to create this opportunity, this is what I had prepared for - I knew I had what they needed…
Everyone was motivated to do the course, but most came with the usual self-doubts:
“Could you really learn practical self-defense skills in 2 days? Would I be able to react if I faced a real threat?”
These are normal fears of course. And the self-doubt side of things is something I’ve put a great deal of thought into. In fact, I contend it’s more important than any physical skill set.
[Despite our track record, despite the amazing testimonials we regularly get, the idea that you can learn to defend yourself in a day or two is still controversial, all these decades later.]
❷ So can you learn self-defense in a day or two?
Ask most experts and they will tell you “no”.
Ask someone who was targeted as a victim but survived a violent encounter, they will answer “yes”.
Reread the quote from our BYOB course 👆
I have studied violence, fear, and aggression for decades and the truth is most people never use technical martial art skills in a sudden violent encounter. Even those who are trained in martial arts will admit they didn't use their technical skills.
So do you need a Black Belt?
The correct answer is “no, no you don't.”
What everyone needs is good situational awareness, effective fear management skills, and a simple strategy with ‘practical/tactical’ movements for when you feel, sense, or are in danger.
Remember the SPEAR System's [new & improved] definition for self-defense:
“THE DECISION TO CHOOSE SAFETY WHEN DANGER IS IMMINENT.”
❸ You can learn life-saving skills quickly if you aren't confusing “technical with tactical.”
I have been dealing with this erroneous belief for decades.
Many confuse learning martial art with learning practical skills.
Again, don't confuse technical with tactical.
Example: I can spend years learning how to swing a golf club properly, but I can also use it immediately, without the proper grip, without the proper stance, to strike an intruder with it in self-defense. 😉
Scenario 1 was the technical use of a putter and scenario 2 was it’s tactical application. (I know it’s not the best metaphor but I wanted you to smile at the visual. Think, ‘Happy Gilmore, “You’re going to die clown”😂 if you don’t know the scene, click here for the tactical use of a putter🤡)
❹ Part of the problem that holds people back from learning simple self-defense (and even applying it) is the erroneous connection between skill and ability.
And that might be the bigger issue.
One’s self-confidence is paramount in any endeavor, small or big.
“If you think you can't, you're probably going to prove yourself right, and if you think you can, you’ll figure it out.”
Mindset is everything, isn't it?
Many people simply don’t believe in themselves!
And that’s their real weakness.
❺ Years ago while reading about Zen and its influence on the Samurai, I came across this quote, “The true warrior seeks weakness.”
I remember chuckling to myself, thinking “duh, how else do you attack your enemy? You find the weakness silly samurai.”
Then years later - as life kicked my ass - I realized the weakness the true warrior sought was ‘self weakness’…discover where you’re weak and get to work - find the weak link/Achilles Heel in the equation.
Discovering your weaknesses makes you so much stronger.
❻ Accept that we’ve got Blind Spots, find them, illuminate them, and get to work on them.
And that’s the one thing you can do to ensure you always improve, evolve, and make yourself more capable and resilient.
Be open to this.
Looking at your weaknesses doesn’t make you vulnerable, in fact, the opposite is actually true:
Hiding from your weaknesses makes you more vulnerable.
Coach B
NEXT STEP STRATEGY…
I've got two ways to make you stronger, smarter, and safer very quickly:
Attend or book a BE YOUR OWN BODYGUARD® course for you, your family, or your team. (Open courses / Host a private course)
Learn our revolutionary approach to looking at fear, the KNOW FEAR® course.
“I just completed the Know Fear Seminar and it was awesome. I was able to free myself from years of past anxiety and I have a roadmap for the future. You did an outstanding job with it. Thank you.”
-Andy Murphy
“Tony Blauer's research on fear management has proven more effective for some of my clients than any of the material I have learned in 20 years of practicing psychology.”
-Dr. Jeff Deteso
“After participating in several of Tony’s courses, it is our opinion that the SPEAR System is the most anatomically and physiologically sound system of fighting available to the professional combatant.”
-Robert C Smith,
MD Medical Director, Direct Action Medical Network
“A comprehensive holistic system... in my opinion, the equivalent of Einstein’s E = MC2 for the self-defense field.”
-Robert Suggs,
Ph.D. 5th Degree Tang Soo Do Captain, USNR (Ret)
“Tony Blauer is the ANTHONY ROBBINS of the self-defense world.”
-Dale Floyd,
Fmr. North American Director World Kickboxing Association
“When the history of this Warrior Renaissance, this Golden Age of Warriors, is written, Tony Blauer will be remembered as one of the great pioneers who propelled us forward to the next evolutionary step in warriorhood.”
-LT. Dave Grossman,
U.S. Army (Ret.) Killology Research Group, Author, ON KILLING
Useful thoughts and teachings, as usual.